Steamed or Fried Rice

So, last night, after deciding that I could handle watching Unforgivable Blackness despite it being a Ken Burns production (aside: I shudder to think what would happen if Ken Burns and George Stephanoupolis were ever to occupy the same room. The ensuing vacuum might take out the entire universe), I loaded up on various "medications" for an evening of Condoleezza Rice, courtesy of C-Span. It was like penance and redemption all rolled into one three hour package...

CNN reports that Condi made it through the committee by a 16-2 vote--Barbara Boxer and John Kerry (more on him in a moment) opting for thumbs down.

The penance part for me was watching Norm Coleman dance the oil-for-food-tango with Ms. Rice--if there was ever such a thing as an astroturf scandal, this has gotta be it. And, by sitting through this sack-of-shit round of questions, I think I've significantly reduced any purgatory time in the event that all that catechism nonsense I'm trying to forget somehow turns out to have a grain or two of truth.

Boxer, on the other hand, decided to remind the viewing public that the Senate is more than a rubber stamp agency. Good for her.

Since I've gotten off to such a late start here (more server stuff to deal with this morning--the good news is that the new machine is up, running, and apparently having no problems so far), I'll skip most of the details, save for noting that if you follow Rice's tortured (pun intended) logic, you could just as easily make a case for offing most Native American peoples as you can for invading Iraq. I hope we don't start hearing rumors about the Arapaho Weapons of Mass Destruction...

Speaking of native--I noticed that John Kerry is back to speaking fluent politicalese, after having a go at Campaign English. That's unfortunate: I thought maybe he'd learned a lesson or two from dealing with swing-state America, but I guess not. At least he voted against sending Rice's name to the full Senate...

Which got me thinking about something I put in the back of my head last fall, even as I preached the virture of A.B.B. to anyone within earshot: one BIG problem with the Democrats is that, even as they adapt to being entirely an opposition party, they STILL sound like politicians. Damn.

Even last night, with the exception of Senator Boxer, I kept seeing the same sort of half-question, half-droning oration of the kind that initially made me think John Kerry was going to have his ass handed to him during the primaries. And, you know what: people see through that bullshit. They may not understand the complexities, or the nuances of certain issues, but they know crap.

Oh--Rice managed to spew out plenty enough crap of her own, so it's not like I'm suggesting that the G.O.P. ISN'T doing this. Hell, at least one response to Obama Barak was so full of shit that I swear my television was beginning to smell. At other times, she filibustered with the best of them, spitting out foreignpolicybabble more or less at random. My guess is that she was either able to see the little lights that tell Senators their round is over--or, at the very least, was getting hand signals.

But, back to my point: if Democrats REALLY want to change their status, they might want to sound less like politicians, and more like citizens. For instance, as I watched Kerry, I kept thinking "just ask a fucking question." If you give Rice enough rope, she'll tie a noose and put it around her own neck in a blue-state second.

And that goes for everyone on Team Bush. Now, you actually have to PRESENT the rope to them--it's not like they're going to go out and find it themselves--but, once in their possession, believe me, they use it for only ONE THING. And the way to present the figurative rope is to simply ask questions--sort of like how journalist sort of used to do (I say "sort of" deliberately--journalists were never that pure, but they were slightly better in times past--these days, they're quasi-politicians and behave that way). I mean, jeez, TBogg notes that Rice, for instance, actually said (in regards to the August 6, 2001 P.D.B.) that "[it] does not say the United States is going to be attacked. It says Bin Laden would like to attack the United States."

If I'd been on the 9/11 panel that day, I'd think I would've burst out in derisive laughter.

There are so many other things you can nail these folks on that it's silly--and all you have to do is make them answer. And, when folks like Rice scramble to run out the clock, you tell them, at first nicely, to "just answer the question," and, if they STILL try to bloviate, you maybe get a little less nice: "Excuse me, Ms. Rice, but you're spewing forth crap. Just answer the question please."

Now, I guess some folks will ask "but what about Barbara Boxer? She gave a speech..."

True--but Boxer also made it clear that she was doing just that. Also, she pulled no punches, and it's about goddamned time somebody did that.

Eventually, the public would realize that the bullshitters ARE the GOP. Just like, to use a now dated analogy, the public saw the difference between say, Nirvana and The Spin Doctors. Sure, the latter got themselves a video on MTV too, but does anyone really wish they had an original release of--well, whatever the hell album they came out with?

The Rethuglicans ARE The Spin Doctors--a bunch of half assed clowns who know just enough cliches to get a video of their own (and, thanks to a bleating, compliant media, plenty of air time for it to run). But scratch the surface and you see that underneath is--well, nothing. Not even a decent rhythm guitar...