Shrub's SOTU: Shit on the Union

"Take my used ideas home today...and your children will make the payments."

Funny--yesterday's anticipated headlines all focused on the boy-Chimperor's upcoming "upbeat" message--but then, probably earning some seething Chimperor rage, Bob Woodruff and Doug Vogt had the temerity to get seriously wounded.

With the fate of reporter Jill Carroll still in limbo, Ayman Al-Zawahiri issuing videotaped taunts, and Christiane Amanpour stating the obvious, all but the GOP Kool-Aid zombie caucus know that the war policy has proven itself an utter failure and disaster. Thanks to incompetence, inattention, and simian chest-thumping, this country went through the worst terrorist attack in history--and followed it up with a poorly planned war against Afghanistan (failing to capture or kill anyone of significance, except for the never ending supply of "Number 3 in the Al Qaeda heirarchy types--I wonder if, like the extras in Star Trek landing parties, they're forced to wear red...). Then, Shrub launched Operation Enduring Clusterfuck, managing to 1) bog down the US military in a land war in Asia, 2) spawn a training ground for terrorists in perhaps the one country that WASN'T a terrorist threat, 3) additionally spawn an insurgency that attacks US forces, and has at least some sympathy among the Iraqi citizens themselves, and 4) put us massively in debt to...communist China. Then there's the recent victory of Hamas in the Palestinian elections--assisted in no small part by...drumroll...U.S. incompetence, negligence, inattention--anyone noticing a trend? And that's just for starters.

On the domestic side of the equation, the dauphin reacted to the worst NATURAL disaster in this country's history by...playing GEE-tar and guffawing with John McCain. Five months later, his grasp of Gulf Coast reality is on par with his grasp of Middle East reality. Let's see: incompetence, inattention, negligence.

Then, take the economy. Please.

Juan Cole has a list of ten things Bush won't tell you about the state of the nation. Since I'm already planning on having a few during the address itself (for medicinal purposes: listening to the guy otherwise makes me want to hurl), I guess I don't require any of Cole's points for a drinking game--though I'll down a pint of rum in one gulp if the dauphin utters the name "Harriet Miers."

Speaking of: I see Strip Search Scalito got his lifetime appointment. Geez. If only someone could put some sort of pill in his tea to make him as annoyingly insignificant as Clarence Thomas...