You Can't "Win" if You Don't Play


...but I'm not sure if I WANT to play a game where Don Young is the "winner:"

Representative Don Young, Republican of Alaska and chairman of the Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, is first in the House with 1,905 points.

Here's a little more on the Congressmanshit:

Powerful enough to earn the moniker "Alaska's Third Senator," this seventeen-term congressman and former tugboat captain knows how to haul home the bacon. Thanks in no small part to his efforts, Alaskans receive $1.87 in federal funds for every dollar they contribute in taxes. Last year, Young leveraged his post as chairman of the House Transportation Committee to stuff the highway bill -- "like a turkey," in his own words -- with nearly $1 billion in pork-barrel projects for his home state.

More than $400 million of the money was earmarked for two separate "bridges to nowhere." One, nearly as long as the Golden Gate, would serve an island community of only fifty people. The second, a monument to waste known as "Don Young's Way," would connect Anchorage to a patch of scarcely habitable marshland.

"These two bridges are the most egregious example of government waste we've ever seen," says Tom Schatz, president of Citizens Against Government Waste. Even the conservative Heritage Foundation called one of Young's bridges a "national embarrassment." But the congressman refused to scrap the projects. In the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, when Sen. John McCain proposed that Young redirect his prized pork money to help rebuild New Orleans, Young accused his detractors of "ignorance and stupidity." The victims of Katrina, he suggested, "can kiss my ear!"

The "victims of Katrina" would probably show a lot more charity to Mr. Young than I would--personally, I'd probably celebrate should Mr. Young oh, say, get run over by a truck...and I'd celebrate even more if he lingered on in intense pain for a while before concluding his miserable excuse for existence.

Well...anyway. Jeffrey found a link to the fantasy website itself. And maybe one day shitheads like Young will be recognized for what they are: the Aaron Brookses of national government.